There were only two things I wasn't afraid of until the age of twenty-five: cats and toast. Cats are graceful feline animals that can't roar and toast is crispy on the inside and crispier on the outside. Momma always told me the world wasn't a safe place. I grew up with seven cats in my house at all times. Not six. Not eight. Seven. When one died, there was another right there in its place. Several times our nosy neighbors called the Cuyahoga County Animal Control. The law was only two cats per household. With this rule, we went through cats like I went through pajamas. Apparently Momma being an alcoholic that went to our local supermarket in skimpy negligees and only bought booze and toast caused uproar in our conservative town of 7,000. That kind of buzz at school didn't help with my self-confidence at school. Momma used to make fun of me and call me "Bed Wetter". Every night my dreams would take me to a river or an ocean and every morning I would wake up with my dream becoming the day's wet reality. So back to cats and toast. Momma was a major reason I lived in fear for twen......

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